37. MY HUSBAND WAS A CASUALTY OF WAR

Dear Mr. Heslin,

I recently came across your web-site, because I was looking for information about my former husband. He was an ARVN advisor in country in 1972. My husband was a casualty of the war psychologically more than physically. He had great difficulty living with the memories of the war, and so we could no longer live with him. As a result our children have grown up without knowing their father.

I was wondering if I could get more information about him. Perhaps it would be a way for my children to know a little more about their father when they are older.

I look forward to hearing from you.

REFLECTIONS: As in all wars, wounds are often more than the physical damage to our bodies. Men suffered deep wounds of their heart and soul and their families felt their pain and suffered with them. Some of us struggled with our wounds and were healed and through it all, our families kept-on loving us. We felt the warmth of their love and that often was enough to pull us out of the cave. Some were unable to hang-on and our families watched helplessly as self-destructive behavior destroyed what was not destroyed in Vietnam. I don't know why some men break and yet others keep it together. I am a person of Faith and I believe prayer has played an important role in my journey. I have a neighbor who has become a friend. He is a disabled vet. He is not a Vietnam Vet but he suffered a great many physical injuries and was the only survivor from a Navy aircraft accident at sea. He struggles with his ghosts and a chemical dependency. Sometimes just a call is all that it takes to let him know someone is thinking of him and cares.